It’s Time

16 Oct

I had to tell Cole that I have a sickness where I make too many tears, and that I was not unhappy with him every time I cry.  This because he’s on fall break and around all the time and noticed that I cry at least a dozen times a day.  He was getting worried.

Because my kid is awesome, he decided that I am a tear factory.  Sounds better than Extremely Depressed And Getting Worse.

I’ve passed the wanting to sleep all the time phase, passed where lots of projects can get me through the day.  I’m sinking into the Can’t Even Sleep, Can’t Make Myself Do Anything, Brain Hurts phase.  This is an untenable phase if I am trying to not ruin my children’s lives.

So, despite there being not one single psychiatrist that I can find who will take me as a patient, I’m going to go back on meds.  Heading to Mexico in the morning to try out something I took a long long time ago.  Hoping it will help.  Needing it to help.  Nothing I’m doing is working and something has got to change.

Happy Fall Break 2013!


5 Responses to “It’s Time”

  1. MBC October 18, 2013 at 9:12 am #

    I hope it helps too and that you’ll be doing better soon. Also, love love love the term ‘tear factory.’ Extra awesome.

  2. Annemarie Garrett October 19, 2013 at 8:24 am #

    I’m sorry. I hope your plan works and you are feeling better soon. Why won’t anyone take you as a patient?

    • eliana October 20, 2013 at 11:38 pm #

      No psychiatrists within 200 miles of my house, and none that I can find several hours away that are taking patients.

  3. Liz October 19, 2013 at 3:55 pm #

    Bring your boys to me.

    • debbiemom October 28, 2013 at 10:37 am #

      I am just so deeply sad reading this post. I love you and hope yu can get on an even keel soon. Or, even for a Osborn girl!!

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